Okay - so I haven't messed up real bad but I haven't been as careful in my eating as I should. I'm thinking the combination of slipping slightly on my diet and an overload of stress is messing with me a little bit. Since I have the adrenal gland issues (which is what is believed to be behind the congestive heart failure) stress wears me out more than anything. So tonight's run was blah!
On my dieting - I've actually had a couple of big victories and my changes have stuck. I turned down BBQ from a local restaurant this week - and opted for a plain baked potato. Then today I was starving on my way home from picking my accessible van up from the mechanic but refused to take the chance at eating out. I had a couple of things in the fridge to eat and ate them once I got home and unloaded. That was hard but because of the lack of episodes and feeling way better I just didn't want to take the chance.
The negative side - I've been eating way too much cheese; and I'm back to guessing on my salt intake. But as of tonight I'll be back on the straight and narrow. I had a really bad run I want to blame on stress.....but I have to be honest with myself. I've learned if I don't have integrity with myself I don't have it with anyone. This is true in running and every other aspect of life. If you fudge on your running log- you're really lying to yourself and will pay in the long run. (pun intended!) So I have to say I have been a little lax which is definitely a contributor to my horrible run tonight.
Actually, this is the first tough run I've had in awhile. I wanted 6 today but crazy things like picking up my van, buying groceries and trying to catch up on my freelance writing from yesterday sucked up a bunch of my time. We had no electricity yesterday due to storms in the area. That means I can't work or run. So I finally got on the TM tonight and sluggishly got the first mile and felt a little better so picked it up a little on the second mile. But then I started with chest pains - haven't dealt with them in a long time! I almost forgot what that was like. So I decided not to push at all and hopped off after just a measly 2.2 miles. It's so frustrating!!!
I haven't had an episode in some time and I'm praying I don't have one now. They take too long to recover from. So -- my body has my attention again and I won't ignore the signs. I was so happy to feel like I was building back up some stamina and actually working on speed a little - not a lot yet, but a little. And wham! This just decked me. I hate it - but the only thing I can do about it is to get myself back on a solid eating plan. I know I need more green veggies (bought some today at the store), and I need to get back to watching my salt. I also sat at my desk to work today instead of with my feet up. But that's because I go to sleep when I sit with my feet up and that makes me mad too.
So my little mess-up is over. I'm converted once again. As much as I hate it - I'm back on the right track. I know it's just not worth it to mess up - and even though I didn't go over the edge this time and do something massively stupid, I have messed up and the small stuff adds up to a big one. I'm good now.
I will beat this thing. And I will run my marathon - and every step is a victory.
On my dieting - I've actually had a couple of big victories and my changes have stuck. I turned down BBQ from a local restaurant this week - and opted for a plain baked potato. Then today I was starving on my way home from picking my accessible van up from the mechanic but refused to take the chance at eating out. I had a couple of things in the fridge to eat and ate them once I got home and unloaded. That was hard but because of the lack of episodes and feeling way better I just didn't want to take the chance.
The negative side - I've been eating way too much cheese; and I'm back to guessing on my salt intake. But as of tonight I'll be back on the straight and narrow. I had a really bad run I want to blame on stress.....but I have to be honest with myself. I've learned if I don't have integrity with myself I don't have it with anyone. This is true in running and every other aspect of life. If you fudge on your running log- you're really lying to yourself and will pay in the long run. (pun intended!) So I have to say I have been a little lax which is definitely a contributor to my horrible run tonight.
Actually, this is the first tough run I've had in awhile. I wanted 6 today but crazy things like picking up my van, buying groceries and trying to catch up on my freelance writing from yesterday sucked up a bunch of my time. We had no electricity yesterday due to storms in the area. That means I can't work or run. So I finally got on the TM tonight and sluggishly got the first mile and felt a little better so picked it up a little on the second mile. But then I started with chest pains - haven't dealt with them in a long time! I almost forgot what that was like. So I decided not to push at all and hopped off after just a measly 2.2 miles. It's so frustrating!!!
I haven't had an episode in some time and I'm praying I don't have one now. They take too long to recover from. So -- my body has my attention again and I won't ignore the signs. I was so happy to feel like I was building back up some stamina and actually working on speed a little - not a lot yet, but a little. And wham! This just decked me. I hate it - but the only thing I can do about it is to get myself back on a solid eating plan. I know I need more green veggies (bought some today at the store), and I need to get back to watching my salt. I also sat at my desk to work today instead of with my feet up. But that's because I go to sleep when I sit with my feet up and that makes me mad too.
So my little mess-up is over. I'm converted once again. As much as I hate it - I'm back on the right track. I know it's just not worth it to mess up - and even though I didn't go over the edge this time and do something massively stupid, I have messed up and the small stuff adds up to a big one. I'm good now.
I will beat this thing. And I will run my marathon - and every step is a victory.
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