Fighting Fears of Failing

I am not sure why I am second guessing myself, I've actually felt really good on my last two runs. Last night I did a couple miles and then tonight I got in 4 miles. I could have gone longer both nights but time constraints and responsibilities kept tugging me off the treadmill.

My first full marathon was horrible and I really don't want a repeat of it at this year's marathon (or two -- yup, pretty sure I'm doing two of 'em this fall). I just dread the long run. Especially right now since I am limited to just the treadmill. And then of course this week I only ended up with 15 miles in all. And next week's schedule looks crammed full already. But- I have to get at least a 10 miler in on Tuesday or Wednesday since I have a half coming up on July 14.

I'm determined to do that 10-12 miles one of those days even if I have to break it up and do 3 4-milers or whatever. I've even thought about just jumping on and off the treadmill and seeing how many miles I could get in a day - just for fun! I still might do that; but whatever I do I have to get some miles in or my head is really going to throw doubts at me. I'll have to taper off a little the next week to rest up for the half, I'm okay with that. One thing I have learned is that rest is highly underrated (but don't tell anyone I told you that - I'll deny it!)

Four weeks into full marathon training and I've already ditched the plan. I never was good at sticking with too many rules to begin with. It's really OCD that I have to blame that on - it sounds funny to you maybe but when my plan says to run an hour - or assigns me 4 or 5 miles and I can't do it that day for whatever reason - it drives me crazy. I know it's not like it's flexible and I could adjust the plan to fit better inside the other responsibilities I have to fulfill...but it just makes me on edge and goofy. So I have ditched it and am just pressing forward into the fifth week of marathon training.

On another note - I'm feeling pretty good these days. I haven't been real good, but I haven't been real bad either. Just been taking in a little more salt than I should have; but I did another toss everything out again today and I'm back on track. My blood pressure has been inching up so I want to get it right back down. It's not high - just higher than it was running. That's one thing that has to be kept under control.

I've also decided to write an eBook about my journey - running with a chronic condition. The outline is together and that's the first hard part. The second hard part is getting started. Once you get started it falls into place....maybe this week.

So I'm back on the wagon again and ready to rock this thing! I'm pressing onward and taking one step at a time because every step is a victory and I'm still moving!

Hello - It's Been Awhile

I am sorry, I had to take a break and get myself focused. However, I haven't stopped, and I've been quite busy really. There's been a lot going on and honestly, I've been living out the every step's a victory mantra. There's been lots of struggles and tons of ups and downs. But I have to say each step toward a healthy, whole life is still victorious. As a matter of fact, revisiting that is why I decided to get the blog back up and going again. I did get a website set up, you can check it out if you'd like. I still have to get the blog up and going on the site It won't be like this one, it will have more general information about healthy eating, exercising and things that are not as much about my own journey, it'll be more educational. Check out the Every Step's A Victory site and let me know what you think so far. For me life continues to be a struggle, I think that may hold true for most people who deal with a chronic condition. It seem...

Cardiologist Update

So I guess I'm just going to have to get used to going to cardiologists and doctors. My primary care sent me to a cardiologist at the Oklahoma Heart Hospital. I think I like this guy (as much as I can like docs). He was very kind, and looked me in the eye when he was talking with me and I liked that. Of course I gave them my standard "abnormal but not bad" EKG. I also explained about my meds and how the other doc wouldn't call me back. He told me not to trust a doctor who didn't call you back. (I was surprised.) He said it's an integrity issue and it sends the signal that they don't care when they don't call you back. I agreed. At the end of the appointment - he gave me a gentle hug and promised to take good care of me. That was nice I thought. (Even though I'm not too keen on "being taken care of.") My blood pressure was great- didn't even mention taking meds for that. I have to say that's a HUGE win. I believe the drastic ...

Ready for a New Start? Get Ready!

I've been quiet for a very long time. I don't even run much anymore, which is why I started this blog in the first place. But don't let the silence fool you, I've been hard at work, and there are lots of cool things coming. I'll make some announcements and give you heads-up about some cool stuff coming your way soon. For now, keep an eye out for launch announcements!! Let's get started with what is going on in my world now. Firstly, I'm launching a series of coaching services, products, and freebies (who doesn't like free stuff?), all based around Every Step's a Victory. The premise is that every single win should be celebrated. Y'all - it's way too easy to talk negatively in our heads. Seriously, we are our own worst enemy! What if we could turn that around and celebrate wins? Really - think about it, when you make a choice that positively affects you, even if it's a small one - that's a win for your soul! Drink a glass of water ...

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